First off, let me stipulate that I can legitimately whine with the best of them. I'll legitimately whine about Sarbannes Oxley, politicians, investment bankers, forced socializing, forced gift giving, missing my art class for something really stupid and meaningless, menopause, weight gain, advertising agencies, modern parents, political correctnesshit, buttons falling off of expensive clothes, the post office in New York City, shitty movies in Hollywood and cable talking head shows. But the distinction here is that to legitimately whine is to whine with friends or family and the subject of legitimate whining is not the whiner's victimhood caused by the whinee. In this respect, whining is very similar to complaining, which is the dialogue of life. He who does not complain cannot be alive. All of that being said, illegitimate whining is what I would like to take apart.
Illegitimate whining is what you see on Oprah Winfrey: "ooo pooor pooor me!"; or that LeFavre interview with Matt Lauer; or anytime you see someone crying on TV; or excluding workplace abuse situations, which are by definition legitimate because I say so, generally unemployed adults calling themselves somehow "abused" outside of work (HELLO--I am abused somehow some way every day, HELLO--who gives a SHIT??, HELLO--I'll worry about MY abuse, YOU worry about yours!!!!!!!!!). Joan the Yenta would like to declare open season on illegitimate whiners: I am hereby giving you all authority to get back in their faces and say "O BOOOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" or "Get help, don't bring it here" or "SHUT. UP!"
Because here's the dirty little secret about witnesses of public whiners: The way we all view the ones with tears in their eyes that willingly go out in public so the WORLD can see them WEEP: everybody KNOWS they are pitying THEMSELVES, they THINK you pity them but you don't, you may spend a few seconds thinking "hmm, well, oh, geez, what if that happened to ME? eye yi yi. hmmmm. oh geez." It's called human nature and as much as modern people think oh how far we've progressed, guess what, it hasn't come as far as you think. Not that bellyaching being a status symbol equals progress, but the "sensitivity" and "compassionate society" bullshit is just plain bullshit. Just go to work and look around you. Real sensitive compassion, right? Har har hardy har har.
Nobody likes to witness weakness. Keep it behind closed doors, where it belongs. Public displays of whiny weepy po po me shit is VERY UNATTRACTIVE.
